Top Chef - S9E9 Power Rankings

This week's Power Rankings come to you from somewhere over the Pacific! Upside, only one week off since I can't get the show in China. Downside, no access to video for this week's rankings. Hopefully my memory's up to snuff.

Though I've already touched on this in the comments, a word on Modernist Cuisine. Those who say it's absurd to spend that much money on a cookbook are absolutely correct. And those who say it's a stunning work that justifies its price are equally correct. I have a copy. I... um... couldn't help it. And in terms of both scope and presentation, it's the most remarkable cookbook I've ever seen. It's hard to predict these things, but in ten years' time, I'd be less surprised if cookbooks had gone out of fashion altogether than if this weren't considered one of the most important landmark food references of all time. It takes an entire generation's worth of culinary innovation, and not only comprehensively catalogues it, but attempts to test, understand and codify it as well. It can be had for $400 in some circles, and while that's a huge sum of money, it's six volumes, manufactured with the care of a fine art book, and backed by years of research and testing. My opinion is that as expensive as it is, the price tag is justified.

So it's interesting to see which chefs are comfortable with modern techniques and which aren't. I'm often frustrated by those who insist that MG is smoke and mirrors, tricks and gimmicks. You wouldn't know if from Chris J.'s performance, but MG's true spirit lies not in using chemicals and newfangled machines, but simply in taking an open and innovative approach to cooking, and refusing to work with the given that culinary technique was perfected in 19th century France. The science isn't in the equipment and the ingredients, but rather in the method, which is one of exploration and experimentation. Of course, many if not most experiments will fail. That's science. MG has produced some stunningly bad food over the years. But MG's legacy will be in the techniques that survive the crucible and are adopted into the mainstream. In the end, it's all about being willing to experiment and sometimes to fail, and I'm always disappointed by the number of people who consider this a bad thing.

Anyway, huge tangents aside, a good quickfire. And though I'm starting to sense that I'm in the minority, I loved the elimination, too. Oddly, it's the first challenge I can think of in which the chefs were really set up for failure, but I thought it was a good challenge anyway. Thing is, you don't just jump into BBQ. This isn't slapping chicken on the grill (though that didn't stop a couple of teams from trying). It makes total sense that somebody like Myhrvold would be drawn to BBQ, because it's very technical, very scientific, and very precise. And experience counts for a lot. Unless there are ringers hidden in the field, this is a very, very difficult challenge and pick any season, I'd expect a lot of mediocre food. But I like that this was difficult not because of some dumb tricks, but simply because making really good BBQ is difficult. I liked that they didn't dumb it down. And for as many seasons as we've had that could have taken place anywhere, I love that this season, they're really making a strong attempt to tie the show into the location beyond a few B-roll shots after the opening credits.

All of that said, one losing team apparently used KC Masterpiece and the other used liquid smoke, so... you know... 30 lashes for all. Side note, if you ever need confirmation that the recipes can't always be counted on to be entirely accurate, look no further than the fact that you're instructed to smoke the winning team's BBQ at 300 degrees Celsius. Low and slow, indeed. I think most of these are thrown together on the fly, may or may not reflect what was actually cooked, and most certainly are not subjected to a rigorous editing process. Or maybe I just really don't want to believe that Ty-Lör actually mopped his ribs with KC Masterpiece and ketchup.

Oh, and anytime the elves want to give the canned car comments a rest, that'd be fine with me. No better way to suggest (or reinforce, some would argue) that your entire show is a sham than by having your contestants recite bad advertising copy and acting as though it's fooling anybody. Product placement, I understand. But this is the apotheosis of lame.

Not a whole lot of movement this week. Everybody looked bad except for Paul and two chefs who openly declared that they were simply executing Paul's vision. And while I love that they worked in BBQ, I'm hesitant to read too much into this week's elimination results...

The power rankings are not purely a prediction of who is most likely to win, or an assessment of last episode's dishes, or a reflection of the contestants' historical performance, but rather a nebulous amalgam of all three, combined with a little bit of gut feeling, to provide a relative measure of current awesomeness.

Wins

Top

Bottom

1 Paul Quickfires 2 3 2 Last Week: 1 Eliminations 2 3 0 ...besides wondering if there's anything Paul can't do well. Have we ever had such a prohibitive favorite in the history of the show? Don't get me wrong, it's gratifying to see my preseason pick romping like this, but really, when this qualifies as one of his less impressive weeks, there's perhaps an issue with competitive balance. And he's the only chef remaining who's never been on the chopping block. You know the phrase. "One mistake..." And yet...

2 Sarah Quickfires 0 3 1 Last Week: 2 Eliminations 2 3 2 Though it's disappointing that the regional BBQ dream team fell flat, I'm not sure how to judge a week in which one of the three goes down with heat stroke. I certainly hope Sarah didn't present her egg yolk raviolo as innovative as the edit made it appear. That's five years behind the curve even in her own city, where Michael Carlson over at Schwa made it a signature dish. Which isn't to say that it isn't so completely totally worth doing. Good is good. But this one's starting to wander into molten chocolate cake territory. Let's not present it otherwise, please.

3 Edward Quickfires 0 1 1 Last Week: 3 Eliminations 1 3 2 I'm a little surprised to hear myself saying that pre-slicing the brisket was one of the lesser sins this week, but especially considering the circumstances, even if it was the wrong call (and it was), I can't get all bent out of shape over it. And though Ed let the jerkitude fly, I will say two things in his defense. First, I didn't see people lining up to defend Jamie when she cut herself last season. Is it okay to question the severity of somebody's injury/illness or isn't it? Something to think about. Second, despite the 'tude, when the moment at JT came when he could have grabbed Sarah by the collar and gleefully thrown her under the bus, he instead walked a very fine line between defending himself and blaming her. That's not for nothing, I think.

4 Ty-Lör Quickfires 2 2 0 Last Week: 5 Eliminations 1 1 4 There's an up and down week for you. I really, really, really hope his sauce wasn't actually KC Masterpiece and ketchup. I mean, ketchup as a BBQ sauce ingredient, absolutely. Many a killer 'cue joint gets ketchup in the mix. But that's like sweetening your corn syrup with granulated sugar. Ick. His quickfire, however, was a great example of MG being used for good rather than evil. It's a really simple dish... an amuse, really... that gets a little technical tweak to lend some character and interest. But the flavors are simple and classic. I can understand why some chefs were rolling their eyes, but I suspect part of the reason Myhrvold chose his watermelon was precisely because it illustrated what I was talking about above. And though it isn't really here nor there in terms of the rankings, I will add my voice to the chorus of folks who think Ty-Lör is showing himself to be a quality human being. Love that phrase, by the way.

5 Beverly Quickfires 0 2 3 Last Week: 4 Eliminations 0 2 3 *sigh*... maybe this is where Beverly really belonged last week. I'm not prepared to put her lower right now despite the fact that she's still the only winless chef. Her hits have just seemed too strong for that. Still, her ups and downs are starting to get comical. Is it really just a matter of not playing well with others? There isn't a direct correlation, though it's hard to ignore the trend. That doesn't exactly bode well for next week. Still, I find her awkwardness kind of charming, and I really do find myself hoping she succeeds. I know there was some mention of a comment from Gail that there's a big transitional moment in store for Beverly. It doesn't appear to be in her blog, and I'm offline so I can't find it, but I'll cop to being intensely curious.

6 Lindsay Quickfires 1 2 0 Last Week: 6 Eliminations 1 1 1 Seven episodes into the regular season, and still waiting for Lindsay to distinguish herself positively or negatively. In its own way, this is almost as amazing as Paul's dominance. She gets screen time, but it's like her food is invisible. It's odd, and this week doesn't help any with that impression. Elimination win! And the admission that she was happily carrying out Paul's vision. Which is great, I'm not knocking that. If somebody on the team has a great plan, I say go for it... take the back seat and shoot for a true team win. I find that rather admirable, actually. But I still don't know what the heck to do with her in the rankings.

7 Grayson Quickfires 1 2 2 Last Week: 9 Eliminations 1 3 2 And Grayson picks up yet another win that's chock full of caveats. They're the same ones that apply to Lindsay, above. I want to give her more credit than this, but we really are given the impression that this challenge was the Paul Qui show. I just can't bump her much.

8 Chris Quickfires 0 1 2 Last Week: 8 Eliminations 0 2 3 Chris made it easy to let her move at least a little bit, though. I know some thought Myhrvold came off as a jerk with the "I grow it in my basement" line, but let's be completely clear about this. Chris speaking to Myhrvold as though he's introducing him to miracle fruit is like a physics grad student going up to Stephen Hawking and saying, "So there's this really cool idea called String Theory..." Whether he was pushed to go into full explanation mode for the cameras, or whether he felt he needed to for Padma's sake, it's hard to say. But consider the possibility that what he did was on that level. The dish itself... well, the horse is long dead, but again, this is Chris and Moto all over again. I've yet to try it, but the whole concept of miracle fruit is amazing. Still, the concept isn't enough. Here's a lemon and some lemon soda and a pill. Great. Whether this dish was meaningful or pure gimmickry lies in the cheesecake component, and unfortunately there's no recipe to refer to. But one gets the impression that he was just so in love with the concept, again, that he didn't stop to consider whether this was the best way he could express modern technique. And then he screws up cooking all three meats. Which, in his defense, was really, really, really hard. But still... not an impressive week for Chris.

9 Malibu Quickfires 0 2 1 Last Week: 7 Eliminations 1 1 3 Malibu is a really nice guy. A really, really nice guy. So much so that from some of the supplementary materials, it appears he threw himself under the bus when the judges were trying to decipher who was most responsible for the failure of his team's meats. Inedibly salty? We all know how that story ends. The only question was who was going to take the blame, and it sounds like Malibu fell on his sword. Admirable, I suppose, but too bad... though his successes have been few, I've found them more interesting than anything Chris has been doing.

WARNING : MINOR EPISODE TEN SPOILERS AHEAD

Oh yes, ladies and gentlemen... it's time. And man, they're setting it up to look like a total train wreck this time. Boys vs. girls! *groan* And nobody seems happy, least of all Lindsay, or anybody who's dealing with Beverly, actually. They're kind of telegraphing Beverly in trouble, which makes me think she's probably fine. But we'll see what happens.

Discuss!

Comments

[anne]

There are many reasons I keep coming back to this Power Rankings so compulsively, but Dom's ability to toss in phrases like "the apotheosis of lame" is high on the list.

[KinderJ]

Loved the QF, and the emphasis on creativity over novel technique. The EC... well, I have never BBQed, so while I get that this may be the right way to do it, it was still a fairly dull piece of television. I kind of wish we saw more creativity from the two losing teams, just to liven things up a bit.

Power rankings seem right, though I imagine any of the MOTPers could go at any time. And not to be "that guy" but I always thought that "apotheosis" meant the raising of a man to godhood.

[KinderJ]

Ah, Random House says there is a second meaning: "The ideal example, epitome, quintessence." Sorry.

[paula]

It's not the fact that it's a BBQ challenge that made this EC so maddening. It's that it was a BBQ challenge with three separate proteins. AND two sides. AND you have to stay up all night. AND you have to feed 300 people. AND it's 150 degrees in the shade. Why didn't they just blindfold them, too?

Love the writeup, though, Dom. Safe travels!

[Independent George]

Which is more brutal: BBQ challenge in Texas, or Dim Sum challenge in NYC? Texans are likely armed, but old Chinese ladies are crazy.

[KinderJ]

Paula- I did find my self wondering why they (the Elves) could not rig up some awnings or umbrellas to cook under. Even some hats would have been good. Cold water is wildly insufficient. You really, really need sun protection, fans/ac, chances to rest in the shade and lower core body temp, etc. It's probably not coincidental that the most overweight person cooking was the first to succumb to heatstroke, but honestly it could have happened to any of them. And yes, the three proteins and two sides for 300 was way over the top. Credit where it's due, Paul handled the challenge superbly. And now he has $35k. Excluding cars, has any contestant in TC history had such a huge pre-finals haul? I am pretty sure the answer is no.

[rab01]

Power rankings always make my Mondays a little more bearable. One blast from the past for someone as dominant as Paul -- Stefan from Season 5. 4 Quickfire wins, 4 Elimination wins, a bunch of top mentions and never in danger of going home. I just hope that Paul still feels competitive when/if he gets to the finals.

[rab01]

KinderJ - An interesting question so I checked the wiki for the Vegas season when they were throwing around money like bacon ... and Kevin took home $45k before the finals but that was mainly because the Bocuse d'Or prize was $30k all by itself.

[TxGriff]

Kevin from S6 (Vegas) won quite a bit of money. He won $30k alone in the Bocuse d'Or challenge, and I think there was another quickfire where he won $15k (the slot machine QF). I could be mistaken, but I think he had at least $45k in winnings, which would put him ahead of Paul for now. Of course, with the way Paul is performing, that is likely to change.

[Independent George]

Theoretically, 90% of the work in BBQ is the prep; once the meat goes in the smoker, they should have been able to sleep in shifts to check up on the meat. In practice, you can't trust anybody else to take care of your food in a competitive environment.

[tigerpiper]

I really liked Stefan and thought he got jobbed by the so called fish guy who needed a lesson to skin an eel.

Game theory questions: if one chef is a standout, do you want to be on his team or not in a three way elimination? If you were that one chef, would you choose stronger chefs as teammates or weaker ones?

[nm]

Didn't Carla win a whole lot of foreign trips?

[Vncntdl]

Agree with Paula here: what could have been a good elimination challenge was made into a rather lame one by the conditions and the # of plates the chefs were asked to prepare. This is the third time as well that they've had this kind of challenge; which is at least two times too many IMO. As for the rankings: nothing really to quibble over. Paul stands heads above the rest right now; its getting a little embarrassing.

[KinderJ]

Carla did win a lot of trips, but not $35/45K worth. Pretty fantastic, though. I had forgotten about the prize for the Bocuse D'Or challenge, beyond that Kevin would get to train for the team with Keller. It was Brian that got stiffed on prize money that season, right? Kept winning EC's, but not QF's. Here it's just Paul winning... everything.

[Nikki L]

Didn't someone do an egg yolk ravioli for the MG challenge (1 of 4 restaurants challenge to be more specific) last season? Dale T?

[ally]

Dom, you really nailed it regarding the Chris-Myhrvold interaction. I won't be able to check this myself (sadly) but I wonder if he looked in the Modernest Cuisine volumes and didn't find miracle berry, then decided to "teach" Myhrvold a little something. Chris had a lot of cringe-inducing moments during this episode.

@tigerpiper - for this season's chefs, if I'm the strong chef I want weaker/more malleable team mates that won't ruin the food with bad ideas. If I'm the weak chef I want to be on his team. Only Ed and Chris would probably think they are better off on a different team (due to hubris not necessarily skill), but maybe not even them. We'll see if the claws come out against Paul as more are eliminated in the next four episodes.

I prefer seasons where, for example, the V brothers, Kevin and Jennifer all wanted to work together to make great food. Good times, good times.

By the way, why is it that we aren't really considering Paul in the "asian chef" category (by we, I mean me and others in a couple of earlier posts)? He does tend to use asian flavors, but I guess his combinations seem so strange/unique that it defies the normal classifications? Speaking of which, I notice that brussel sprouts are on the menu at his restaurant, not a surprise having seen him use them at least twice this season. Speaking of which again: if we were keeping track of dishes that include watermelon, I think we'd probably be in the double digits by now.

[Nigel from Cameroon]

"Have we ever had such a prohibitive favorite in the history of the show?"

Perhaps a rhetorical question, but ranking 2-5 pretty much nail the answer

[Libster]

About the recipes. I've never seen real attention being paid to those. It looks like they are just slapped on the site quickly. I was also frustrated once when they offered up a winning recipe for viewers to make at home but half of the ingredients and instructions were missing.

I don't know why she was so angry with Ed about the heather cake incident, unless she is just tired of hearing it. She didn't bother me much with her attitude, however when I think about how someone in a number 2 position at some point in time. A Jen Carrol, a Voltaggio Brother, or a Kevin G would come back and be more concerned helping the team than plating their best pieces for their dish, it makes me like her a little less.

I'm looking at the boys vs girls teams for Restaurant wars. The women look a little less poised to win. With the leader being Sarah, and the guys with the leader of Paul and a supporting cast of Ed and Ty-lor. Will the men be able to help chris J and pull him out of the basement to win?

Also I'm going to miss Malibu, he seems like a nice guy who likes to have fun. He had his ups and downs but when he had his ups he got some major praise. Too much Salt will kill you.

[Wgarton]

Has anyone tried the miracle berries? I'd be curious whether they have an off-putting taste or if it would be more creative to include them in some sort of dish so that there is a change of flavor mid-meal. Probably too thin of a line to walk in the heat of battle, but the New York Times has written about miracle berries. By the time they know about something...

[Anon Man]

Yeah, I think I like these ratings completely. I know Dom probably isn't reading these, but my biggest nit is calling BBQ "precise". The rest of the adjectives, yes. But, when I think of precise I think baking or tweezer food. Sure, there's a lot to go into good BBQ, and smoke meat a fair bit, but I don't think of it as precise, as there is a fair bit of play you can do with the cooking. So, technical yes; science, sure. But, not precise. I quibble, I know. It's my problem; I'll deal with it...

[Libster]

@Wgarton

I've only had the pills which you can get at thinkgeek.com - http://www.thinkgeek.com/caffeine/wacky-edibles/ab3f/?srp=1

It's been awhile, they taste the dried fruit. surprise surprise. A friend said they had a raisin taste. this was back in 2009 so I don't actually remember the taste of the pill itself.

Researched the Miracle fruit again and found there is a lot more data out there over the last few years, and it wouldn't be too hard at all to make a cheesecake, given the way cream cheese, goat cheese taste when the tartness is removed.

[chrish]

"I really, really, really hope [Ty-Lör's] sauce wasn't actually KC Masterpiece and ketchup."

Didn't Myhrvold praise the sauce? Maybe I'm confusing with something else, but if not, I don't know whether that's saying something about Myhrvold's palate or the recording skills of the Bravo recipe folks.

[chrish]

"I don't know why she was so angry with Ed about the heather cake incident, unless she is just tired of hearing it."

I still wonder if that was filmed later, after the elimination challenge, so that she was pissed off with ed by that point.

"She didn't bother me much with her attitude, however when I think about how someone in a number 2 position at some point in time. A Jen Carrol, a Voltaggio Brother, or a Kevin G would come back and be more concerned helping the team than plating their best pieces for their dish, it makes me like her a little less."

There are contestants who veer more toward the strategic player versus straight ahead put-the-best-food-out-possible chefs. (And no one, with the possible exception of Spike, is purely one or the other.) I'm fine with either. Sarah is definitely on the strategic side.

[Libster]

You could be right about that, she seemed to have a short fuse with him and it would only make sense that the comments about heather and the cake were actually filmed after the EC.

Your right about strategic and straight. I think there is just a little more integrity that comes from playing it straight.

Even Mike V. couldn't do it during restaurant wars with Robin. In fact I think he actually helped elevate her dish.

[Bart]

You know, Dom, your description of MG, particularly this line: "The science isn't in the equipment and the ingredients, but rather in the method, which is one of exploration and experimentation."

...reminds me so much of Julia Child. Those of you who have read "My Life in France" know that she was very technical, very exact, very scientific when it came to constructing recipes. She could very well be the pre-MG MG poster Child. (sorry, couldn't resist)

Looking forward to this week's episode.

[caulder]

That miracle berry QF was just so lame and played out. In college everyone agreed that I made the best top ramen in the world, provided I got them all really high beforehand. He seems so concerned to try and represent himself in a certain way that he's falling all over himself. I think the best thing for him would be to quit his job and try to reset himself. Stop trying to be something and just be something.

[Duffy]

Masterpiece BBQ sauce and ketchup?? Liquid smoke??? I missed that in the first run through. Blech! Wouldn't these blasphemies top mere oversalting?

[Sweet Sue]

I'm sure it's a sugar bomb and full of all kinds of crap but I've gotta say that KC Masterpiece original is really delicious.

[Duffy]

Sweetsue: "...KC Masterpiece original is really delicious."

I agree, and reach for it myself frequently ... but if that's the criteria, why couldn't they send out to Goodwood or Chili's for a baby back rib take out and go take a nap?

[Independent George]

I completely missed the use of liquid smoke. Why would you need liquid smoke for something cooked on... a smoker?

[Skillet Doux]

IG... His team's BBQ didn't make the recipes page, so I don't know how it was used, but in a little throwaway clip in Whole Foods, Malibu is listing things they've either gotten or need to get, and he mentions liquid smoke.

I like to think justice was served.

[Joanna]

@Caulder: "In college everyone agreed that I made the best top ramen in the world, provided I got them all really high beforehand."

Oh man, warn me before you do that! I am dying over here!

[gilmore]

In the south, barbeque is smoked meat. One of the contestants, on hearing they were going to make barbecue, said how much they loved cooking on the grill.

Grillin ain't bbqing.

Thus we get -
brisket wrapped in foil (How will it absorb the smoke flavor?)
Dr. Pepper and Liquid smoke
grilled chicken

Did anyone smoke their chicken?

The hard part of smoking chicken or turkey is crisping the skin. It needs to be coated in butter or oil. I smoke at between 200 and 250, depending on the meat.

Maybe Ed is getting the new villain cut. Ty-Lor could have been just as pissed but it was edited out perhaps?

Before the season, on the old SkilletDoux site, someone mentioned how good Ed's casting video was. I have liked him from day 1. Paul is awesome.

Can't argue with the rankings.

[rab01]

I'm from New York where good barbeque is notoriously rare and I've never used liquid smoke so this is an actual question, rather than rhetorical:

Why is buying liquid smoke a crime against food?

Isn't having it as a back-up a smart hedge against the possibility of equipment failure?

[Sweet Sue]

Of course you're right, Duffy. KC has no place in a chef competition but I had to stand up for its taste fabulosity.

[Danny]

The "miracle fruit" pill is why MG gets a bad rap from so many people. Here, eat this pill, then a lemon and voila it tastes like an orange. Then why don't I just eat an orange? It's introducing chemicals and gimmicks where they seem unnecessary and just there to call attention to themselves. Let's develop pills that make a chicken taste like a trout, a tomatillo like raspberry sorbet, a fine wine taste like Mountain Dew. Okay. Let's. And the point would be........

[gilmore]

Rab01 - Just my opinion -

1. smoked meat should have a delicate smoke flavor that permeates the meat. Liquid smoke is like a sledgehammer that only creates flavor on the outside of the meat.

2. Part of the art of smoking is the wood that is used. Mesquite, hickory, white oak, red oak, pecan, apple, cherry, green wood, dried wood, etc. all bring different flavors to the meat. Everyone has their preferences, and sometimes it is linked to where one lives. I use apple wood, pecan or hickory on chicken; hickory and oak on pork shoulder; hickory on brisket, etc.

Liquid smoke is hickory flavored. No variety.

For me, the number one is that the smoke flavor should penetrate the meat and every bite should have the same smokey flavor.